As believers we know we are cleansed and free from the bondage of sin. I don’t know about you, but I wrestle with the question: why can’t I be perfect then? Why do I still feel like a complete mess cakes some days?
We are washed clean and justified by Christ’s blood when we turn to Him and live for Him. We then receive the Holy Spirit as a gift to teach us, guide us, and help us. If we have repented of our sins, are washed clean, AND have the Holy Spirit, why do we still mess up? In John 13 we read the account of Jesus washing His disciples feet. Jesus made His way to Peter but Peter said, no Lord, don’t wash my feet! Jesus says, if I don’t wash your feet you have no part of me. Peter then says Jesus: wash my whole body! Jesus answers with this (paraphrased): those who are washed don’t need their whole bodies washed, just their feet.
What does He mean by this? In that culture, anytime they walked outdoors their feet got dirty from the dusty road. They didn’t need a whole shower from walking outdoors, but their feet were filthy and needed cleaned.
What if this analogy means we are baptized and washed clean from our sins, but we still walk in a dusty world. We get dirty from this world. We need Jesus to wash our feet so we don’t track the world with us wherever we go.
It is the act of sanctification. We are justified, but Jesus daily sanctifies us. We are going to get dirty from the world but we run to Jesus for strength, help, and to continually be washed in sanctification. We won’t be perfect– we walk a dirty path– but Jesus washes it away when we continually run to Him for cleansing.
Jesus is more concerned about our sanctification than our comfort. Peter wasn’t comfortable with Jesus washing his feet, but Jesus knew He needed to be cleaned.
I often look at my own heart and I see I hold onto “dirt” because it revealing it makes me uncomfortable before Jesus. I don’t want Him to have to deal with it; I don’t want to bother Him. I hold onto it because it seems easier. I hold onto my:
- Insecurities because I don’t feel worthy
- Fears because I don’t want them to come true
- Anger because I feel justified
- Doubts because somethings feel impossible
- Dreams because I am scared they won’t come true
- Pride because I feel empty without it
- “Control” because I feel out of control without it
I hold onto elements of my brokenness because of varying reasons, but not because I want to. In a spiritual sense I am saying, no Jesus, I am not worthy for you to wash my feet. I don’t want Jesus to touch my “dirt”.
When I hold onto my insecurities, fears, anger, doubts, dreams, pride, and mirage of control, I am holding onto human limitations. I am not fully experiencing the cleansing, pure, and life changing water that scrubs my heart clean. If I walk around with dirty feet I track dirt everywhere. If I humble myself and allow Jesus to wash me clean, I can freely receive and be filled up with His love, compassion, strength, security, and then pour that out to others.
It isn’t comfortable to be scrubbed clean of these things by our Savior, but it is the only way we can be filled to the fullest with Him so we can pour out on others. It is the Spirit’s work in my heart to fill me with the fruits of the Spirit. I can’t muster up enough of my own strength to truly live them out the way I am called to. But it is my job to humble myself and allow Jesus to wash my heart of the dirt it is harboring, so I can be filled up with His fruits.
In this cleansing, I can be filled and freely receive Jesus, so can I pour out genuine godliness to others.
How is Jesus washing you today? What dirt are you in need of cleansing?
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Fear is my one big monster! I SEE what can happen and where I used to say Trust God, He’s got it, now I say What if? What if he lets me die in a car accident of worse takes my family away. I’ve morphed Him into a vengeful God and don’t know how to move back to that solid trust I had just a few months ago. 😭
Fear is such a hard thing to deal with! He has us all on a journey, it may not always be fun but we can always grow into stronger people because of it! <3